My Fate - Part 5

 Doorbell rang early 6:00 am. It was my parents at the door. We were still sleeping and I rushed out of bed in panic. I had planned to get up early and prepare myself, but alarm didn’t go off. Bell rang one more time. I had no time to change my nighty. My husband was in deep sleep. I shook him up. At first he was reluctant to get up but soon he came to senses. He started rushing to open the door in his naked in his shorts. I stopped him, helped him slip his t-shirt and sent him. I was relieved a bit. I was getting tensed and nervous to face them. I was not sure what should I wear in front of them. I pulled my sky blue salwar kameez with full sleeve, as I have faced them in salwar kameez most of the time at uncle’s place. I placed dupatta at place to hide my grown up breasts. Quickly tied my open hair at back of head to a bun. There was happiness inside to meet my parents after so long, but I was more than shying from them. Particularly form my father, because I thought he would be feeling ashamed of me. I might be a disgrace for him. After all, any father would think so, when his son is no more a son but a girl now. But I have never seen him angry with me after my transition. So I too wished not to make him unhappy and accepted all that he chose for me. Soon I was in front of them and after greeting, took a seat opposite to them. I kept my eyes down, neither looking at them or at my Husband. My father was talking to Deepak and in between would glance at me. Seeing me uncomfortable my mother came and sat beside me. She then put her arm around me in affection. I felt nice. She had loved me most since childhood and cared for me. Everyone was quiet for a while and then Deepak interrupted.

Shruti let’s make tea for papa; he said.

You two carry on I will help her in kitchen; my mother replied for me, and we left to the kitchen.

Are you happy here? She asked, and I nodded my head in yes.

          She then started making tea while I stood there. She never let me do anything at home and taking that for granted, I let her do the chores. My memories of childhood became fresh and felt I became the same carefree person again. I was spoilt child of my family whom everyone would pamper and serve. All younger kids would be afraid of me and would obey me. I was digging in my past memories standing motionless and circling edge of my dupatta around my pointing finger.

Shruti, take this tray and serve them tea; mother said.

          I meekly obeyed and  served them. Soon I became comfortable with my mother and she took full charge of the kitchen. She asked me to go, as she would manage herself. I came to my room feeling relieved. Deepak too was there. To my surprise, he didn’t react as usual. Instead, he kept laying without paying me attention. He was well behaving, I guessed. It was good for me. We kept quiet for a while laying on two sides of the bed.

Don’t cook lunch for me and papa, we are going out and will return by evening; he said.

Where? I asked.

Papa will take me to one of his friend, who will offer me a better job. We will leave by 10 am; he replied.

Okay; I said, and became relieved.

          They left at 10 am and now I was left alone with my mother. She had finished with the kitchen, and in meantime, I had cleaned the house and bathed. By noon, we were free and gossiping. We weren’t talking freely though. She sensed that and kept soothing me and acting as I was a girl since birth. She complimented my earrings, hair, clothes etc. I didn’t react. She was trying hard to make me comfortable. She asked for my honeymoon album. I said no. She started making my hair and massaging my head. I felt very nice as it was after so long I was getting pampered. She braided my hair, and I became surprised to see her make French braid. I haven’t seen her making it before. I asked her about it, and she smiled.

I had no daughter, so you didn’t see, now I have one and I am making one; she replied. This brought a faint smile on my face. I hugged her, and she hugged me back.

Beta, to be happy in life, we should face reality and accept our fate. You have to settle your life yourself. You are my good child and I know you will; she said, and continued. Your father is trying to get your husband a good job. Hopefully he will get one.

I could have found a job for myself and would have been independent and happy; I said. Why did you marry me so early? I asked her.

Beta, you don’t understand how worried we are for you. Living life as a single girl is not safe in this society. You need support. You would not have got support back at home. Deepak is matured person. He understands responsibility. He will keep you happy and you will be safe here. Why do you worry about money? Your father is there. He will arrange everything for you two; she replied.

          I found no use arguing her, but I was determined to make my life independent. I could not imagine spending whole life confined in a home. The problem was, I had no degree and finding a good job without it would be difficult. I could get a personal secretary or receptionist job in a small office though. Anyway it was something to start with. I may impress my superior with my talent and can get promoted. These thoughts I keep recall every now and  then. I am beautiful to qualify for front desk role. I guess, I just need some makeover to look chick and getting used to western outfits. I have seen those seductive receptionists in offices and hotels wearing bold make-up and exposing cleavage. I may not be allowed to dress like that, even if I get a job, I thought.

What you generally do in free time? My mother interrupted.

Nothing; I replied.

Why don’t you learn to cook? You will spend your time and feel better; she said, but I didn’t reply.

Does your husband give you time? Does he behave with you properly? She asked, and I nodded in affirmation.

You have become thin. You should eat more. You will look better; she said.

Mummy, I don’t want to become fat like you. I won’t get a job then. I am planning to apply for a receptionist job soon. You buy me some good clothes, so that I can go for interview. I was waiting for you to come; I told her.

Beta, don’t do that job. I suggest you that. Don’t you see how people look at them. You are innocent, you will get in trouble. They make them wear small dresses. Its not good job; she replied.

I haven’t completed my studies, so how I will get a good job? I will have to start somewhere; I replied.

Have you asked your husband? She asked me.

No; I said.

Talk to him first; she told me.

I don’t need anyone’s permission. He is dumb; I said. I was full of anger with teary eyes.

Okay, I will talk about it with your father; she relented, and to divert my attention, she changed the subject.

Let me paint your nails and change your bangles. A newly wed should take care of this. In evening we will go to market to purchase you some clothes; she said.

          She manicured my nails and painted it red. Put enough vermilion on my parted forehead. I wondered why red was so revered for a married woman. It looks hot, but why should a woman look so bold in public? Doesn’t it gets impression to the others, that this woman been just been licensed to some man, who is fucking her day and night? When people stare at me, I get embarrassed with these thoughts. It was a true fact, which experienced by me. I can’t count how many times I have been fucked in just three months. Moreover, the more red hot you look at home, more you will be fucked by your husband Of late, I was thinking like a feminist and thought of voicing against this tradition. Women have their own set of problems. I will have to face many of them in this life, I was certain. For my betterment, I would have to start coping with them and learn to struggle my way out. I was determined to start working no matter what the conditions are and get back my freedom. I got ready adjusting my dupatta and went to market with my mother. I took her straight to the upmarket, as I wanted to purchase some western clothes. She was unaware or my plan. I took her to a mall and we entered a fashion retail. She wanted to visit the traditional section, but I pulled her other way. She could not resist and I purchased some tops, a  pair of jeans and a set of women office suit. I would wear them for interview, I planned. I also purchased make-up items and perfume. I was very happy and excited when we returned home. My husband and father were already back and were relaxing themselves on sofa. From the appearance, it looked they were happy over getting the job. I was relaxed, as I would have time to explain them of my shopping or would just hide my shopping from them. So I initiated the conversation very friendly and before they could notice the handbags, I swiftly hid them in my cupboard. My husband’s full attention was on my French braid. He was bowled over by my new look. My father too gave me a strange look, as if he was seeing some unknown person. At night, I lay beside my husband enquiring about the day’s outcome.

I have got a job as a store manager at a factory. I will go to work from tomorrow onwards; he said. I was delighted. Now I could plan for myself. I will have plenty of time.

Darling, wont you miss me? I will no more be available for you all day. We can only spend time together at night; he said.

Yes, but you need to work make a living; I replied. He started fondling me and kissing me.

You look hot in this hairstyle. Why didn’t you do it earlier? He murmured.

Mummy did it. I don’t know to make it; I said.

Mummy knows my taste it seems. She cares for me; he said.

She cares for you, since she does not know the devil in you. When she gets to know that you are sexual pervert, she would stop caring; I replied with a smile.

Okay, since you have labelled me such, then let me act as one. Anyway I have missed my morning dose of romance today; he said.

          He started kissing me violently. My bangles were making noise in the silent environment of night, which must be reaching to my parents. I was trying to keep the noise low. I was relaxed mentally for things progressing positively in my life, so I was also enjoying his company again. Soon we were naked and embracing each other. He seemed happy at my participation in the act after many days. I slept through the night in his arms. There was a new joy in me.

          Like the previous day, today we awoke at the knock of the door, but this time it was at the door of the bedroom. It was seven in the morning, too late for us. We both were panicked and looking at each other face. Door knocked again and I had to respond.

Mummy I am coming; I said.

          My undergarments and clothes were scattered all over the place. Deepak soon rushed to the bathroom and It was my turn today to handle the situation. I quickly gathered my clothes, put on the nighty and arranging my hair I opened the door. They were worried that, Deepak might get late for office on his very first day itself. I joined the chore, to make him ready for the office. While mummy took charge of the kitchen, I shuttled between bedroom and kitchen readying his stuffs. I found my father turning his head towards me every time I moved past him. Maybe, he had seen me first time in nighty. It was bit too frilly and silky. I sensed my mistake, but I had no time to change it. My nails painted deep red and loose hair was adding to my sex appeal. To add to that Deepak called me, ‘Sweety’. He was asking for his shirt. I was totally embarrassed. I rushed to bedroom and gave him stern look. He sensed his mistake and said sorry. But the damage was already done. I felt I would not meet my eyes with my father anymore, at least for few days. We anyhow made it on time and Deepak left for office on time.

          Now my mother started her lessons for me. She started instructing me on how to handle morning rush. Preparations I was supposed to make in advance, to make him leave for office on time. She was loud enough to reach me in bedroom and of course to my father on the sofa in living room. I wished she could give me those lessons in person and maybe later in the day ,when only two of us would be at home. I kept nodding, so that she finishes soon. I was busy arranging the bedroom and bathroom which was left in a mess by Deepak. I picked all his clothes to the washing machine and hanged the wet towel outside. I noticed my parents smiling at me and complimenting my work.

See how well she does her work. You were bothered about her all the time. She has learnt nicely; my mother told my father. He did not reply, but simply smiled back. My eyes met him and I too smiled back before shying away. My mother came behind me to bedroom.

Your father says that you have become a good caring girl. He can look forward to you to take care of him when he gets old; she said. I just smiled back at her.

Today, we will go to aunty’s home, it’s been long; she announced. Initially, I was reluctant, but later relented. She combed my hair and made pony. She wanted me to wear saree, but I refused. I wished to wear jeans top to visit her and show off my independence to her. I still hated her for being so bossy. But my mother would not let me. Finally, we agreed on a purple salwar kameez with net sleeves. I tried to look my modern best to tease her. I had matching accessories to complete my dress. A matching earring and sandals. My clutch purse was matching too and looked expensive. My mother handed me a gold chain with diamond pendant.

Why have you bought so expensive chain for me. I don’t need them; I told her.

We are coming to your home for the first time, so we brought it. Nobody goes to their daughter’s home empty handed; she replied.

          I felt happy as well as sad. Sad at the fact that, they were regarding me as outsider by being formal with me and bringing gift for me. She put the chain around my neck. It was adding to my beauty and I liked it. I soon put a light layer of purple lipstick, when she went out to fetch something. I did not want her to notice me doing make-up. I also put little perfume on my dress. I just wanted aunty to be jealous and not feel pity for me. My diamond ring too adore my painted finger.

          When we reached aunty’s place, she greeted me with her plastic smile. I could notice how she was amazed after seeing me. I guessed right, she would not have thought of finding me looking so good and affluent. I greeted her too with another wide plastic smile.

You are so beautiful. You have carried yourself so nicely. Your dress is so beautiful. Deepak must have bought it for you; she kept praising me.

No aunty, I myself have purchased it. He has such poor sense of dressing. I have to buy his clothes as well. I keep visiting market and malls; I replied.

          I wanted her to acknowledge my freedom and realise how unhappy I was, when she confined me to her house against my wishes. My mother ankled me, gesturing not to speak ill about my Husband. Later in the day I had to help aunty cook food. We together had lunch and it reminded me of my old days. The house looked untidy, particularly uncle’s room. He was very pleased to see me, but was very formal in front of my parents. But his eyes were stealthily on me all the time.

          In the evening, my father went for a walk and mom and aunt went to her neighbour to gossip. I was left alone with uncle in the house. He was very happy to see me after so long. We smiled at each other across the sofa table. I had a mission now, to impress him and get him convince my parents for my job. I moved to the other side, closer to him, and seducing him.

Seems that you have forgotten me; pulling his cheeks, I said.

It was you who left me for that man; he pulled me towards his lap at once, and replied.

Do I look beautiful? I asked him.

Much more; he replied.

Why didn’t you call me? I asked him.

I thought, you are happy with your husband. You are no more interested in me; he said.

How can I forget you. After all, old is gold and you are so nice; I flirted.

          My only hope lay on him. I knew he only could take me out of this life. Soon, he was holding me tightly. My magic was working. I had put on nice perfume, which was seducing him since he entered the house. His hands were soon on my breasts, as if measuring the amount of growth. I kept gazing at him smilingly. He knew he had no time as someone would come home very soon. I just wanted that. So that, his lust remain intact and I have chance to meet him again and again. Soon bell rang and it was over. Aunty had surprisingly returned. We were back to our seat. We soon headed for our home, as it was time for my husband to return and my mother did not want to get late for her son-in-law.

          At night, I greeted my husband smilingly for completing his first day in office. He was tensed early, but soon got back to his favourite act. Soon he was fondling and kissing me. It was routine as usual.